My hormones are out of control.
I am not going to lie, things have been pretty tense around here.
Never fear, I have a doctors appointment set, and I am not leaving that place until I am fixed.
It really, really sucks to get old(er).
I haven't even tried to figure what is going on with my mood swings.
I used to be able to keep my crap together, and knew when "my bad week" was coming for the month.
I would stock up on some chocolate or something, and get through it.
Now, however, it seems like I only have one "good week" a month.
Some days, I am filled with a bitter sort of rage...I feel like I could implode at any minute.
Other days I cry a lot.
From overwhelming blessings...(gratitude)
Because I found a picture of the kids when they were babies...(nostalgia)
Remembering what it was like eating Lofthouse cookies without guilt. (wistfulness)
Or generally weeping from plain old anxiety.
I am super fun to be around when I am like this.
It is like living with Bruce Banner.
I am a hot mess o' crazy right now.
I can't even tear my own hair out, cause, well...it's leaving of it's own free will.
My hair is shedding.
Every day, after I shower, I am picking hairs off of my body, the counter, the floor. The stray hairs tickle the back of my arms, and drive me insane until I find them.
I have been known to ask random strangers in grocery stores to "please see if they can see a hair by the back of my arm?"
"Get it?"
"Thanks!"
The hair that is falling out of my head, is growing on my chin.
Or my moles.
I have invested in a very expensive pair of precision tweezers.
It is almost a full-time job, the tweezing.
I bought a nose-hair trimmer.
I NEEDED it.
Insomnia.
Fatigue.
The bloating.
Night sweats.
Day sweats.
Random break-outs of acne? WTH? I am 30 freaking SEVEN!
The only thing that had been bringing me happiness is my nightly bowl of ice cream.
I wanted to share with you, my fine reading pool: My Recipe for Happiness.
And also, because if I am gaining weight from all this happiness, then I need to make my friends a little fatter too, so we can just love each other in spite of our physical imperfections.
Do you have a can of evaporated milk?
Do you have ten minutes?
And some ice cream?
Then proceed to the happy place:
Hot Fudge Sauce
1 c. sugar
3 T. cocoa
6 T. butter
3/4 c. evaporated milk
Boil for five minutes, stirring constantly then add:
1 t. vanilla
Let it cool a bit, and top that ice cream!
I store mine in the fridge in an empty frosting container.
Rinse that pan out, and let's go again!
Caramel Sauce
1/2 c. sugar
1/2 c. packed brown sugar
6 T. butter
3/4 c. evaporated milk
Boil for five minutes, stirring constantly then add:
1 t. vanilla
Cool a bit, and top your second bowl of ice cream.
Or third.
Whatever you need.
9 comments:
OMG! I just posted on my blog a very ambiguous post but this is basically every.single.word I wanted to write!!! It started two years ago at 39 for me and I've HAD it!!! I'm calling my doctor in the morning. (((hugs))) and you are sooooo not alone!
I have an easier hot fudge recipe than that and it is SO good. Take one can of sweetened condensed milk, put it in a glass bowl with one cup of chocolate chips. Microwave for a minute, then stir. If it's not all melted, give it another 30 seconds. Get it out, put in 1 TBS butter and 1 tsp vanilla.
Who needs ice cream? I'm calling it chocolate soup.
Wooo I am going to have to make some ice cream topping delights..You know I love snacks and YOU!
Big hugs to you, Shaunte. I went through this and it was thyroid issues. I hope things get better for you (and your family) soon.
40here and could have written that post! Pre menopause SUCKS!!!!
That sucks. I'm so sorry. Your baby maker is at fault here, not you!
Take care and I'll eat yum fudge ice cream food hug goodness with you any day.
Laura M.
I am so with you. Been about a year now. Menopause. I refuse to go the Dr. cuz then they will tell me it's menopause and then old age has been confirmed. Nope not going. I like denial.
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I'm totally making those.
Plus, I hear you on the hormone thing. The hair is inSANE. When you go to the doctor you should ask about getting on the pill. The pill that's called Seasonale. It helps with the hormone craziness (I can't imagine how crazy I would be if I WASN'T taking it, because even on it, I'm still a little bit wacko) plus: "that" special week only happens every three months.
Talk about happy place.
And now I am off to trim my 5:00 shadow. On my eyebrows. Didn't I just have them waxed YESTERDAY??? ;)
How sad that we all can relate to pretty much everything you wrote! I am so worried about being an old lady with long chin hairs that I can't even see because I will be in dire need of glasses! Yikes!
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