Sam watches golf on TV every Sunday.
There really is nothing worse. And it goes on….and on….When they break for commercials, he switches the channel to the Bowling tournament. (Oh yes. He does.)
Sometimes I make dirty comments. (whispering like those stupid commentators) “Oooo, looks like he used his steel shaft for that hole” (polite clapping) Heh, heh. Sam is never amused.
One day, I couldn’t hold it in any longer.
“Honey, is something else on?”
“Like what?”
“Anything.”
“I want to watch this.”
“Well, don’t you think if we are both watching TV together, maybe we could try to find something we are both interested in. I never watch TV, the least you could do is find a movie or something?”
“Are you kidding me? Did you happen to forget the YEAR you were obsessed with Trading Spaces, and never once did I complain when I had to watch that freak Frank sponge-paint whimsical borders or that ding-dong Doug and his big nose. (Good gads…he knew their names…) And just last week I didn’t say a word when you subjected me to a RIVETING hour long COOKIE BAKE-OFF on the Food Network! The Food Network….”(shaking head in disbelief)
Touché.
3 comments:
Shaunte,
Your doing it all wrong - find out who the hot players on tour are, then religiously follow them like a crazed fan.
For example, I love Phil Michelson. I talk about him like we're long lost lovers. "Oh, well Phil does this. Phil said that, isn't he a cutie? I just love Phil, isn't he the greatest?"
It will drive Sam to detest watching golf with you in the room!!
Let me know how it goes.
KD
If I ever watch golf, which I never will, I would love to watch golf with you so that we can make dirty comments together and giggle like 12YO.
And Doug from Trading Spaces doesn't have a big nose. That man is quite attractive. But.. I do sorta have a thing for big noses.
He can remember all that, but can he remember to pick up his socks or stop for milk on the way home?
You better say no, or I may hate you a little.
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