Shopping.

“It’s hard to be positive when your fat pants are tight.”
-Cathy




Sigh…. I haven’t blogged lately about the whole gym thing. I still haven’t lost any weight. Frankly, I am getting tired of the “you must be gaining muscle” thing from supportive well-wishers. I don’t want muscle. I just want to take up less space in this world, and for pete living sake NOTHING fits anymore.

I don’t know what it going on. I feel like I am trapped in a spiraling vortex. I eat less, I exercise, and I am getting bigger. But, I am not giving up! I am waiting for that magical day when my body decides it doesn’t need to hold on to all the food storage I am carrying around. I hope no one is behind me on the treadmill when that happens.

I went clothes shopping yesterday, cause I am tired of looking like crap, while I am feeling like crap. I found a few cute things while dragging five kids around—three of which are boys that were completely mortified to be within touching distance of the bra section. Heh, heh.

Shopping is depressing.

Here is my problem(s). I have no chest, so scoop/ and or plunging necklines are right out. I have no waist. Truly. My babies just slide all the way down my torso when I try to “hip” them. So tighter shirts are just eh…I have a slab of bread-dough where my abs should be that comes around on both sides of my hips, so low riders make me have the proverbial “muffin” top. Arm flab. Did I mention that too? Yeah, so these teeny tiny tight tee shirts cinch me off at the armpit like a tourniquet.

It is darn hard work to find things that look flattering on me.

I finally found a cute vintage tee-shirt, not too tight, a little bit of a sleeve, long enough to cover the “muffin” very simple-- with a single leaf on it, and embroidered around it was the word “fresh.” I thought it was a complete score. Until I took it home and showed Sam, to which he replied: “Nice, honey—that is a marijuana leaf.”

I guess its going back today.