The bookstore. (alternately titled another embarrassing moment.)

Once Sam and I went on a little weekend trip that took us through St. George, UT. I can't remember exactly why.

I do know that we hit the outlet stores that are there.

I especially loved the bookstore. I had several books picked out. It must have been April, because I had books picked out for my Mom and Mother-in-Law for Mother's Day.

Anyway...I had this stack of books, and was in the check-out line waiting to pay.

There were a couple of people in front of me. We were all lined up in front of the check-out counter. The cashier was behind the counter that was a little over waist-high, and wrapped around almost the whole front of the store. There were little shelves in the front of the counter, and they contained those cute little itty-bitty books.
"A mini-book of Haiku" "How to Make Shadow Puppets." "A Creepy-Crawly Field Guide."

I love those. I don't know why.

The person in front of me got finished, and left. The cashier was finishing up. I was up next.

At that moment...Sam let this HUGE fart.
It was so loud, I can't believe the reverberation didn't knock those little mini-books off the shelf.
And then...
HE DUCKED DOWN!! Below the counter, and out of view.

And left me.
Standing there.
Holding my books.

LIKE I WAS THE FARTER!

There was no where to go, and by this time Sam had scuttled off like the vermin that he is.
The cashier is staring at me, wide-eyed.

There was nothing I could say or do.
"Hey, man...that wasn't ME."
Um, yeah, I believe you...being that there is NO ONE ELSE AROUND.

And I really wanted those books...

I mentally bolstered myself, and reluctantly stepped up to the counter and paid.

Meanwhile, Sam went out to the car to wait. He was laughing his butt off.
His NOW EMPTY butt.

Do you see what I have to go through?