My stuff on TV!!

I have a hard time using these brads from Karen Foster Design. http://www.karenfosterdesign.com/p_home.asp

I love them too much. I rarely create a layout that I think is worthy of them. I love to just look at them in the jar...I never want to put them on anything, cause that would mean "parting" with them. I have heard *rumor* that shaped "bling" brads will be forthcoming--

Be still my heart.

I am so lucky and blessed to have landed the gig to design for Karen Foster. I literally have to pinch myself whenever the big brown truck pulls up delivering boxes from KFD. Such great stuff, always fun and inspiring, and wonderful ladies who work there...

Karen Foster Design decided to give the Home Shopping Network a whirl. http://www.hsn.com/I got to design some projects with the kits they will be selling. And my stuff will be on TV, as demonstrated by the lovely Samantha!!

Two segments aired today, and I missed them--I was doing the church thing when they aired. I had a friend TiVO it for me, we are not yet high-tech enough here to do that--we barely have Direct-TV, before last year we had to subside on Peasant TV (local channels) alone.

So Monday, the third segment will air at 9:00 (MST). Tune in if you are around!

SMOOCHES to Samantha, Tami, Judy, and the rest of the gang at KFD!

I hope you keep me around for a while...

I went biking.

I rode a bike yesterday, for the first time in about six years. HA! It was my husband's bike, which meant that to get on and off I had to use the curb....my legs are too short by about three inches, and that center bar hits me really, really wrong.

His bike had the bike seat attached to it. You know, those car-seat type chairs that bolt on the back. I always wondered why they have seatbelts in those suckers. If that bike is going down, wouldn't it be better for the child to be ejected, than to skid exposed flesh across the gravel?!? Anyway, we have had the bike, and the seat since before the twins, and then realized one seat didn't help us, unless we were to stack them. Thus, we ended the family biking days.

I rode it to pick up my three year-old from my Mom's house. All of the car problems we have been having left me with no vehicle. I didn't go to the gym, so I thought it would be good for me.

Why? WHY!!??

What masochist designs bike seats? Who are they comfortable for? They are like torturous, cement butt-wedgies. There is no way to shift positions to make it any easier to take. I have ridden bikes in various weight stages throughout my life. Skinny heinie, fat heinie....it always hits those stupid bones.

It is the next day, and dang. My butt....

I need to find a banana seat, or a tractor seat. Or just not bike anymore.

Not to mention the fact that carting around a three-year-old that shifts, flips around and points at everything made me clench my "cheeks" a little, for grip. The bike was wobbling all over everytime Mikayla moved on me. That didn't help. I was sure we were going to go down a few times, and it would have been real ugly, since I can't reach the ground.

Blog Challenge

This entry is in response to Sophia's blog challenge to blog about where you live.

I have lived in Lehi, Utah pretty much my whole life. When I was a little girl, my parents and I lived in various rentals for a few years until they built their current home.

Sam and I grew up a couple of blocks from each other. We went to high school together. I never thought I would marry a nerdly local boy! Lehi High school (home of the Pioneers....?!? [real tough-sounding mascot, eh]) was small enough when we went there that everyone knew everyone else. Now it is huge, they have added onto the school several times over, and will be needing a second high school soon.

After Sam and I married, we lived in a cheap apartment in the ghettos of Provo before we built our current home in Lehi. Both our parents still live here, as well as most of our siblings. Awesome for babysitting!

A lot has changed with my small town. It isn't small anymore. It used to be that on Saturday night you would see almost everyone at Kohlers, the local grocery store, stocking up on last-minute items before church the next day.

There were three local mom and pop places to eat in town, Porter's Place, the Broadcaster, and my junior year in high school Vittles fast food moved in. Since then, we have added Wendy's, Subway, KFC/Pizza Hut, and I knew we hit the big time when we got our own McDonalds!

Of course we are most famous for the Lehi Roller Mills. Do you recognize it? LOL! They filmed parts of "Footloose" here, in the 80's. Kevin Bacon danced in my fine town. Put us right on the map! The Roller Mills is still a functioning flour mill. They have yummy mixes. https://www.lehirollermill.com/comersus/estore/

Although I really hate Utah weather, I love where I live. I can't imagine living anywhere else. Unless I need to run from the law, then I will be happy eating pineapples on a beach somewhere in Mexico. ¡Buenas vacaciones! Hasta luego.

We'll get to the picture later--

Whew! Spring Break is over, thankfully I am back to a more normal (kid-less) (husband-less) routine.

Sent the kids off to school, and hit the gym. My gym has a new cardio theater! This thing is AWESOME! A huge screen, with a whole lotta cardio equipment. They play fairly current movies, that rotate. Today I watched the last part of Dodgeball, and the first part of Hitch. I have seen both of them before, but forgot pretty much everything, so it was a very good gym day for me. Good entertainment. And the best part, is it is pitch-black in there, and LOUD so no one can see you making those grimace faces or hear you huff. Now if only they served up hot buttered popcorn...I could go for that.

We didn't do anything special for Spring Break. Just hung out a lot, watched some movies, did some yard-work, and stayed up way too late. The weather was great, and we spent a lot of time outdoors.

Sam and the boys played basketball and 500 with the football. I snapped some pictures, and caught the classic above.

Sam and his family are the most competitive people I know. They are out for a win every time! I grew up in a family where people let you win to be nice. Dad would conveniently trip right before the finish line, and us kids would sail on past him, red-cheeked and triumphant.

Sam's mom will mow down any grandkid that gets in the way of her lay-up. Naturally, Sam is still competitive. He truly believes that to this day (at 34) with a *little* practice, he could walk on to most college athletic teams. I am glad he is confident. I lost that somewhere around 25.

Now look at the photo of my husband, and our nine-year-old. See how Jayden was in position to catch the ball? Oh wait, what's this? 210 pounds of DAD right up in his grill. Yep. Look at his face. Smug superiority. He caught it! And the crowd goes wild.....!

Better luck next time, Jayden. But niiiiiice tighty-whiteys.

Spring Break please be over soon....

All the kids home, all day.

This is a glimpse of summer. I better stock up on the Mountain Dew. Nay, I better start figuring out how to mainline the syrup directly into my veins.

I took Shianne with me to run some errands. Left the other kids home with the secondary care provider (Dad) us girls needed some one-on-one time.

We stopped into Kohls. Last time I was there I discovered that they had a cosmetic counter, with rows of open samples. Eyeshadow and blush, lipsticks and foundation; all laid out with cotton swabs and cotton balls. I thought they did away with those in the 80's when everyone in Junior High got pink-eye from using the same tube of sample mascara. But there it was, in all it's glory--a six-year old's dream!

So we did us some white-trash quality time, where I gave her a bona fide make-over right there at the make-up counter at Kohls.

She chose the colors. I thought she looked a little like a (much older than six) street walker. She thought she looked beautiful. We ran right home and took pictures. Her smile for that shoot just about melted my heart! It has been way too long since I have seen her smile with full *look-at-me-world!* confidence. We need to work on that. On giving her individual attention, and telling her more often how beautiful she really is. Another failure in progress as a mother....

On a side note, my nine year old was given a plastic flute of some sort to practice with during the Spring Break. Daily. I wish I were deaf. And his teacher will be getting something really, really special for Teacher Appreciation Day.

The $2000.00 coat.

Any Jeep enthusiast would know, that this past weekend was Easter Safari in Moab, Utah. The hills are alive crawling with jacked up off-road vehicles and testosterone. I went once- it was all I needed.

So Sam takes the kids (hee hee)--and looks forward to a weekend in the red rocks. I look forward to a weekend without kids, and a little shopping. It's a win-win.

I just don't get the whole Jeep thing. I don't understand how gunning a vehicle up the face of a cliff, and *almost* rolling off the side falls under the definition of fun. I will never know why when a vehicle falls off said cliff, all the spectators cheer, snap photos, all the while muttering under their breath what "that idiot driver" did to fail his mission.

To me, that is a needless and expensive accident. Not even an accident, cause it was deliberate!

That is like me, shopping and finding myself a new dress, and then putting it on, running out in the parking lot and rolling around on the blacktop just to "see what she can do."

Whatever. Sam likes it. He looks forward to it. That is a good thing, to have something to look forward to-- no matter how stupid it is. He always invites me, but I hate to hold him back from doing something he enjoys. Plus, I've already been once. He took me on a trail that was rated a 2, and I felt my spirit leave my body several times.

So, off they go. He called me when they got there. "Do you want the good news, or the bad news?" (This is never a good question) (And come to think of it, there was no good news)
"I checked the Jeep twice before we left, and somehow it slipped into first gear and was not in neutral the whole way up here. I dropped the driveline somewhere in Spanish Fork canyon.....blah, blah...transfer case...blah, gas line....."

All I hear, really, during the course of this conversation is...$$$$$$. And $$.

I really do feel bad for him. So he takes it into a garage down there. Now, Moab is a small town, I bet this one weekend subsidizes the whole economy down there. I bet Sam subsidized the whole economy down there. But Sam is convinced that "these guys are good dudes." He gets it fixed, and they are on the trails the next morning, when my Dad promptly blows his Jeep too. Back to the shop, the same shop for his Jeep. Except due to recent events they have expanded and given everyone raises...

Fast forward to the next afternoon. Both men are feeling pretty lucky(?), and enter a raffle. They are giving away great prizes! Drive lines (I bet they just gather them all off the freeways to Moab) Winch kits, Bumpers, and then a butt-ugly patchwork stitched leather coat. Guess what Sam is the proud owner of? Yep. The Frankenstein coat. Even our 6 year old thought it was hideous and laughed the whole time Sam was walking up to accept his costly souvenir.

So there you go. You are looking at a $2000.00 coat. It is going to be on eBay soon. It comes with a free Jeep.

Red Lily Chat and RAK

Hey anyone reading this thing, help a girl out...

I am the guest designer for the Red Lily http://www.theredlily.com/ this month, part of what I get to do for them is host a live chat on their site. It is tomorrow (Sat) afternoon at 3:00 (mst). I think you have to log in, but it is free.

Jason, the owner of Polar Bear Press has offered up some cool, cool stuff for me to RAK! I will enter the names of the people who show up to the chat, and draw a name for a full set of the new Polar Bear Press Alphabet papers!

There will also be RAK's for some of the new doodle rub-ons, and some of the new paper line.

You can see them all here: http://www.polarbearpress.com/8x8a.html

The previous guest designers have been Leah Fung, Nia Reddy, Donna Downey, Rhonna Farrer, and then........me.I have nightmares about the chat.....That they open it, and there is just me. And silence. And crickets.And then only one person shows up to say "Now, who are you?"

Come on over, chat, and try for a RAK!

Loser Mom.

I am soooo not a yard person, I wish my friend Erika http://erikafollansbee.typepad.com/ lived closer and I could sucker her into taking care of my flower beds.

When I was in the hospital three years ago in April, after my c-section with Mikayla, my sweet sister-in-law Molly brought me flowers. They were gorgeous pink and purple Hyacinths planted in a bright pot. So Springy, and they smelled absolutely DIVINE! All the nurses would comment that they could smell the flowers out into the hallway. When I got home, after the blossoms died down, I planted them in my yard, and in spite of my brown thumb, they actually made it!




Each Spring since, they bloom, and remind me of Mikayla's birth, and Molly's thoughtfulness.

Yesterday, Mikayla went outside to play with her sidewalk chalk. She hadn't been out long, when she came back in to bring me a bouquet of flowers. Yep. She pulled up the Hyacinths. I was so angry! I scolded her to "not pick Mommy's flowers..." She told me she was sorry, and scampered back into the sunshine.

I put the stolen flowers in a chipped teacup, and set it on the table.

All day long my house smelled so stinkin' good! Even Sam, who doesn't seem to notice the stench of his own feet, commented on how pretty the Hyacinths smelled. The whole downstairs smells wonderful, thanks to the little cup of blooms.

Now I think of the irony. Of my little two year old little girl picking my prized flowers because she thought I would enjoy them. And I do---much, much more inside my house, than outside in the yard. And I yelled at her! I yelled at her for picking the very flowers that remind me of the beautiful day that she was born.

Today I am a loser mom.

Where is MY doughnut!!?

Our elementary school has had "Dads, Dudes and Doughnuts" for several years now. Each grade has one day a year where the Dads show up to the school, packing blankets and books, and the kid and their Dad (or if unavailable, their chosen "Dude") sprawl out in the cafeteria, and read and eat a glazed doughnut from the local country bakery.

Well, I guess enough Mom's complained and wanted to get in on the action, so they started "Mom's, Math and Munchies."

Lets just go ahead and say that Math is not my strongest suit. Admittedly, I still count on my fingers. My multiplication is shaky. I have made do in my life, and have come to terms with the fact that anything to do with Math requires me to go into survival mode. For instance, the only way I can figure out how much 30% off something really is, is to figure 10%, 10%, 10%. To double a recipe that calls for 2/3 of a cup of something is to just measure 2/3 of a cup of that something two times, and dump it in. My friends know this. They count for me at Bunco. I have to take their word for it whether I win or not.

So really, for me, "Mom's, Math and Munchies" is public humiliation.

Math games. Two words that *really* shouldn't belong together. Much like diet butter. And the "munchies..." Oooooo boy. This time they went all out and gave us all dixie cups full of Goldfish Crackers---but not the original Goldfish. The new and improved "Colored" Goldfish. They look and smell like cat food. Found the above photo online--sorta shows you the visual appeal. I like the additon of the scum cleaning net....

All in all, a great way to start a day. Some Math, and some cat food, and its not even noon.

Where the crap is Spring?

This is getting depressing.

I am tired of wet kid's shoes blocking all my furnace vents.
I want to wear capri's and flip-flops.
I want to spread a blanket out on the lawn and read a magazine in the sun.

Yesterday it rained and snowed at the same time. Came down like a 7-11 slurpee machine.
Sucked.

I am ready for Spring, even if is means pulling weeds....

My friend and fellow Polar Bear Press designer Cari tagged me this morning. So, here you are:

5 snacks I enjoy:

1- Cadbury Mini-eggs (in season) otherwise Dove Chocolate
2- Cottage cheese scooped up with Sour Cream and Cheddar Potato Chips (Seriously. Try it.)
3- Sugar Babies
4- Keebler E. L. Fudge Cookies the original kind
5- Homemade Carmel Popcorn

5 songs to which I know all the lyrics:

1- Any Erasure song, but I sing the best to "Phantom Bride"
2- Any LDS Primary Song, taught for seven years...
3- The rest---I am a little sketchy on, I usually make up my own words anyway.

5 things I would do if I were a multi-millionaire:

1- 10 percent right off the top for tithing. ;)
2- Pay off debt for us and our parents. Siblings are on their own....
3- Buy a beach house in Puerto Escondido, Mexico.
4- Buy a plane, send Sam to flight school so we can jet to the beach house.
5- Anonymously make payments for people who are struggling financially.

5 bad habits:

1- Caffeine
2- Not cleaning up after myself right after I make a mess.
3- Cursing
4- Parking myself in front of the computer too much.
5- Nagging kids and Sam.

5 things I like doing:

1- SCRAPPING!
2- Reading
3- Playing cards and board games with family and friends.
4- Travel
5- Bargain shopping

5 things I would never wear, buy or get new again:

1- Bikini
2- Xyron 850 or whatever it was, the big one
3- Anything spandex
4- An Epilady (hair-removal torture device from the 80's)
5- Sea-monkeys--just too disappointing.

5 favorite toys:

1- 20D and lenses
2- Photoshop 7.0
3-http://www.perlerbeads.com/ Perler Beads!
4- Homemade Playdough
5-http://www.constructiontoys.com/store/qrc-marblerun.php Marble Runs

5 people you will tag:

1- I think everyone has been tagged, kinda like when you hear the Amway spill for the first time, and you are all excited about it, until you realize that everyone and their dog has been approached. If you have *not* been tagged, and you are reading this...consider yourself one of my five.

The Shelf Theory

My husband and I go out almost every Wednesday night. Date night. My Mother-in-law, (who ROCKS by the way) offered to tend for us on Wednesdays. She says it gives her a chance to see the kids, I secretly think it is because she knows I kinda got the shaft marrying her son....HA!

We usually just go to a movie, so there is rarely a movie out that we haven't seen.

Me? I love a good video. I would rather sit at home in PJ's wrapped in a quilt, and be able to pause the show if I need to. But the nice thing about being me, is that by the time a movie comes out on video, I have forgotten most of the plot. It's true.

I have a theory, that has helped my loved ones to understand what is going on up there in my brain. It is the theory of "the shelf."

My brain is like a shelf. All my memories are sitting on the shelf. The important stuff is heavy and big, and mostly stays there. Things like the birth of my children...

The small things are haphazardly shoved on the shelf, and the shelf is quite full. Too full, in fact. And now, whenever a small item makes it's way onto the shelf, sadly, another small item must fall off the shelf in order to make room for the new thing.

So when we are standing in front of the RedBox DVD rental unit, and I ask my husband "Have we seen this? Did we like it?" He knows that it has already fallen off the shelf. He can enjoy it again, and I can enjoy it (again)--for the first time.

It's good to be me that way.

Let's Talk Laundry.

Yesterday I actually saw the bottom of my laundry pile. I know, cause a hairy black spider was there. No doubt he has been there for several weeks now. He probably has a wife and a small family by now.

Sometimes my laundry pile is so mountainous I feel like I need to hire a sherpa.

And even with all those clothes, my kids still insist on dressing like an ad for a thrift store. Yesterday, my daughter wore a yellow sun-dress over some black and purple velvet stretch pants. She said it felt pretty. Kudos to her. My daily track pants/tee-shirt ensemble feel like, well, sweats. Nothing pretty there.

Gone are the days for small wash loads in this house. When I gave birth to the twins, I had four kids under the age of three. I could literally put every single article of clothing my children owned into one wash load. No one was bigger than a 2T. I loved the scent of Tide, and would actually be excited about trying the new scents of fabric softener. Spring Bouquet, Tropical Breeze, Mountain Meadow!

Now they are all bigger, and play dirtier. Laundry day is every day.

So you can imagine my sheer and utter joy and amazement at actually seeing the bottom of the laundry pile!

This of course, was short-lived. My two year old wet the bed last night. The laundry gods are laughing! I have stuffed animals and bedding to wash today. Somehow, defying the odds of science, a 4-ounce Juicy Juice box was enough stimulation to cover sheets, a blanket, a bedspread, and four stuffed animals.

It's going to be a while before all that is April Fresh.

Just a funny picture.

I have nothing important to say.

Spent a relaxing General Conference weekend with my little family.
Ate lots of junk food.
Enjoyed the warm Spring weather.
Took some pictures of the kids with my new lens!
Sent the kids to bed an hour early (thank you daylight savings, although I am going to curse you in the morning.)

Guest Designer RAK

Hey anyone reading this thing, help a girl out...

I am the guest designer for the Red Lily http://www.theredlily.com/ this month, part of what I get to do for them is host a live chat on their site. It is on the 15th of this month. I think you have to log in, but it is free.

I will be sending out a RAK, I will enter the names of the people who show up to the chat, and draw a name for a full set of the new Polar Bear Press Alphabet papers. You can see them here:
http://www.polarbearpress.com/8x8a.html Sound good?


The previous guest designers have been Leah Fung, Nia Reddy, Donna Downey, Rhonna Farrer, and then........me.

I have nightmares about the chat.....
That they open it, and there is just me. And silence. And crickets.
And then only one person shows up to say "Now, who are you?"