Tuesday, January 22, 2008

A new routine

I still don't like to exercise. Wish I did. But...I have been exercising. That is the good part. The bad part, is that Sam has been exercising with me. Okay, I guess that is not all bad. The motivation is great. If I put it off, he asks "Hey, are we doing a tape tonight?" So, I have been pretty regular about it. Almost every night, in fact. And yes, we do TAPES, as in VHS. Shush.

We put the kids in bed, and THAT is a term I use very loosely. They always end up getting out of bed for a million different reasons. Mostly for the sheer entertainment of watching both of their overweight 30-something parents huffing and puffing to an exercise tape.

Which leads me to the bad parts of Sam exercising with me....

Why.

Why do men have to make noise when working out? Why?? PLEASE TELL ME! Why is it, when he lifts weight he always has to grunt? We are both lifting weights. I am sure my weights are just as heavy to me, as his are to him (comparatively), and yet, physically it doesn't help me to Gaaaaaarrgh! Hmmmmff! and Yyyyooooorff! when I lift mine.

And when we are doing abdominal work, side by side on the cramped family room carpet, the intense crunches ALWAYS elicit a fart from him. Always. Sometimes a string of farts. To fill the small room.

And when we mix up the routine with those giant exercise balls that you sit on for core work-outs, you should hear him rip farts off those! In fact, I am sure you have. They are that resounding.

And then he laughs. It's so funny!

I just love working out with him.

I found a tape we both like. Please do not laugh as I make a recommendation for an exercise tape, and yes they sell it in that new-fangled DVD format. I like the tape because:
1- It requires no coordination. For which, I have none.
2- It mixes weights and cheesy lunges and stuff. And you don't even need weights, really. I have moved up to 5 pounders, but you could start out with like soup cans or something.
3- It is only 40 minutes long. Including warm-up and cool-down.
4- The tape has three workouts on it, two 40 minutes and a ten minute for when you don't really want to do much.
5- I can make it through the whole workout.
6- You will be sore the next day. But not the sore that you curse all exercise and never want to be sore again, just the "Whoa, I feel my thighs!( Arms! Butt!)"
7- It's only a penny on Amazon. And $2.98 to ship.

Are you convinced yet?

Sam likes it for the same reason that you all are going to make fun of me...
Please don't make fun of me...

Just spring for the three bucks, try it, and then shoot me an e-mail. Thanking me for changing your life and toning your body.

It's...um, Cindy Crawford.

Sam likes the eye-candy.
I wish she could smell his gratuitous fart offerings.

8 comments:

Sara said...

I lost it completely when you mentioned the farting!! That sounds like something my husband would do!! Actually come to think of it he does...often...except at any given time...no tape needed!!

Good for you that you've got motivation that's working for you! I wish I had some...maybe I'll ask my hubby to fart to the oldies with me!! LOL!!!

laura vegas said...

you ready for this shaunte ... i have that exact cindy crawford tape! and yes, i said VHS tape! lol! i have her 2nd one too! i used to use these inons ago ... "back in the day".

and the farting ... that's something i hear all the time around here. except it's from my girls! lol! they are so proud of the ones they can rip ... and let me tell you, they can really do some good ones!

Janet O. said...

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! The visuals (and smell-o-visuals) are killing me...I think I will refrain from having MY husband exercise with me...lol!

All8 said...

I always knew Sam must of had "hidden" talents. Don't tell anyone but I still have my 'Thighs and Buns Of Steel' VHS, but alas no VCR. I'm going to go finish laughing while my kids pester me to tell them what's so funny. Hahha hhha hhhaaaaaaa.

Candi said...

shaunte, i seriously about peed my pants! thanks for the good laugh! another one that doesnt take much coordination and gives you a little eye candy is the biggest loser, the workout. with the hot guy trainer...yum! except you can hardly walk up the stairs when you are done because of the good leg workouts you get!

Anonymous said...

You are such a lucky woman.

Lora3677 said...

ROFL!!!!!! Chris and I were just discussing exercising together tonight with the Wii... maybe I should reconsider.. HA!!

Amy Sorensen said...

This is EXACTLY why I won't work out with my DH. I hear it enough when we're just hanging out, I can't imagine the exercise farts. MEN!!! ;)